New Year, Same Antics

"Let auld acquaintance be forgot... something, something.... Something!"

And so, the house was still standing. This past Saturday, I attempted to throw my first-ever New Year's Eve Party. It had to be done. Ally was getting tired of celebrating New Year's without me for the last six years (somehow, I always ended up working) and I didn't want to have to decide between groups of friends for New Years. So, as they say, if you want something done right... or in this case, obnoxiously, noisily, and over-the-top... do it yourself.

Despite my absurdly early start-time (4:30PM) things eventually started taking shape around 7:30. Folks from near and far were trickling in between 7 and 9. And for a while, I had more west coast friends than east coasters in my house! Jimbo, Kate, Andy, and Manda all had hoofed it from the Washington state to join in the festivities (okay, they might've been in town for other Christmasy reasons or such... how would I know?

Congrats to Manda and Andy on their Wedding Engagement!

As Chris and Mad have been so generous with their photos, I had a veritable embarassment of riches to choose from. Of course, as the night went on, I my appearances grew stranger and stranger (read: "drunker and drunker")... so here on Effin' Sweet, there'll be a bit of self-censorship as it were. Plus, I'd like those who weren't there to think that the party involved more than just me running around, red faced and wild eyed, wearing a jaunty santa hat and double fisting champagne bottles. Uh... no. That hardly happened... at all.

I'm talkin' 'bout the Chronic! What? Culs of Narnia! Baker's Dozen, Muthaf*cka!

If you don't know what I'm talkin' 'bout... check out this great SNL Music Video, "Lazy Sunday!"

Oh, the Frothy Goodness!

Though I had earlier gotten the bright idea to suggest everyone make their own "pimp cup" to drink from, a quick visit to the local craft store (and yes, I'm embarrassed about how familiar I am with those) squelched to project, as fake diamonds and gem stones are only slightly cheaper than actual ones. Being the unemployed goon that I am, I settled for a series of beer cans for the night. But Mad, provided me with a surprise pimp cup, a gigantic wine glass, whose booze capacity has not yet been easily measured. Currently, it's been shipped to Stockholm so it can be accurately calibrated by the Nobel Committee for Absurdly Oversized Drinking Containers. Who knew they actually existed?!

Cigar Walk '05: Front Row: Andrew, Mark, Kevin; Back Row: Mike, Nim, Al, Jay, Matt, Jim, Esteban, Brian, Me, Kris, and Andy (Chris is taking the shot)

I finally put a dent in my infamous cigar box from July, as I happily shared my wares with my amigos for our annual tabacco'd trek around Floral Park. The tale of the infamous cigars is thus: despite your best intentions, don't bring an American-bought box of cigars to a Cuban family party. It's sorta akin to volunteering Ragu sauce at a traditional Italian Dinner. Everyone laughs it off with a sort of "who invited that guy?" kinda look.

And in the category of things I never thought I'd see again: Kris Liard on Long Island and Michelle drinking a beer!

Happy reunions abounded as our good buddy from back-in-the-day, Kris, triumphantly returned from weird, wacky world of Ohio. Yes... that's someplace west of Manhattan... I'm not exactly sure where, though. All kidding aside, it was great to see the lad again, even temporarily.

"She pulled out the DVD... then I pulled out my berretta!"

The White Elephant Gifts went off with nary a hitch this year, with several memorable contributions. Andy got a Zombie Survival Guide, Chris got Spider-Man web shooters... and Mad once again flexed her creative muscles and lent her skills to a five-part White Elephant Gift that culminated with a set of three "portable, hand-held urinals!" However, the true jewel of the evening was Erin's pick - "R. Kelly's Trapped in the Clost" the DVD! Put in by Kat, it turned out to be a fun way to finish out the evening... a 20 minute laugh-fest involving infidelity, midgets, Bridgets, gay pastors, and berrettas. Despite his child-molesting tendencies, R. Kelly is arguably the comic genius of our times. Touche' Dave Chappelle!

Thanks to one and all for joining us for ringing in 2006. If the party was any indication... this should be an awesome year indeed!

Feedback Question of the Day:
"If you could go back and change one thing you did last year, what would it be?"